Just a Bowler Cherries: We Meet at Last

We first saw our little guy's chubby face on August 11, 2014. Almost 19 long months later, we got to meet the big personality behind the joyful giggle. Here is the story of that first day...

Friday, February 26, 2016

I'm not sure anything truly prepares you for the moment you meet your child. I can say that I was much more coherent and in a lot less pain when I met Tai than when I gave birth to my other children. Matt was genuinely concerned that I was not overjoyed at the prospect of holding dear Anna after pushing for three hours. Have mercy. I was vomiting and could barely hold up my own head to look at her. (She was gorgeous, of course.)

I tried to keep my expectations low for that first meeting. In all of the descriptions and videos we had of Tai, he was a very happy, outgoing little guy. However, we had no idea how or if his foster mother had prepared him for this day. We had no idea if his foster mom had prepared herself for this day.

We were in for a treat.

We hired a Canadian photographer named Greg to accompany us to that first meeting. We wanted to be fully present for Tai, but also wanted this huge day in his story (and ours) to be documented. Greg came to our hotel that morning to meet with us and take candid photos as we prepared for the day. It was a gorgeous morning in Seoul. Sun shining, blue skies with little smog, and only a light coat required. He shepherded us around the subways of Seoul to Eastern Social Welfare Society, giving us a quick tutorial of the carefully crafted and user-friendly system. Along the way, he gave us tips about Korean culture (speak quietly on the subway). I am so grateful that God gave us Greg that day. He greatly reduced our anxiety over getting to Eastern, and allowed us to soak up the new sights and smells of our son's home country.

When we arrived at Eastern (a little bit late- ACK!), we had to first fill out the online forms for Tai's visa. We were carefully walked through the process, and even got to see our cutie's South Korean passport. Seeing his passport was one of those "this is really happening" moments.

The kids waited across the hall in the Eastern Cafe. Some of the moms who decide to keep their children are employed there through a program Eastern implemented to help these mothers. It is not easy being a single mom in South Korea. Having a baby out of wedlock is South Korea's scarlet letter.

Greg hung out with the kids, and then came to see us. He took photos of us completing the visa process and on one of the famous blue couches. Almost all of our updates each month featured Tai opening our care package or playing with a toy on one of the blue couches.

We were told that Tai and his foster mom were waiting for us up on the second floor. Cue internal freak out. We had been waiting for this moment for almost two years.

We climbed the stairs with our many gift bags, and then suddenly... there he was. I saw his foster mom whisk him toward us and then place him on the ground, excitedly pointing toward us and saying, "Appa, Omma!" He somewhat hesitantly took the last few steps to us, and then the rest gets kind of blurry. I'm sure I said, "Anyanghaseo" (Hi) or something to that effect. I know I got a little teary and that my first thought was, "Oh my goodness. He is so little."

We were told to get on the elevator and go up to the third floor to the play room. Anna had the thought to try to record on her phone, so we have a blurry video of an excited little Tai running into the elevator, and then turning around and saying, "Appa..." He was telling us all to get in the elevator. We think he also said Omma, but the video cuts out and we were in shock.

Once in the playroom, we saw his bubbly, funny personality emerge. He loved taking all of the plastic fruit from the play kitchen and putting their velcro halves back together. A grape half could NOT be put together with an apple half. He would have none of it. He took joy in trying to then cut the halves apart with a plastic knife.

There were several times during his play when he would look at us the same way we were looking at him... a bit in awe by the fact that the people in the photos were here in the flesh. In a moment that will be forever burned into our memories, he looked up into Matt's eyes, pointed, and said, "Appa." And then, he smiled.

We brought out the soft Oklahoma City Thunder balls from our bag of tricks and began throwing and rolling them back and forth. He laughed and laughed. I could listen to that beautiful sound ALL. DAY. LONG. We learned that the word for ball is "gong."

Our little man seems to take great joy in being the center of attention. He enjoyed having one of us help him walk up the slide, and then someone else catch him at the bottom. Greg brought out his harmonica to get Tai's attention, and Tai wanted to play it, so he did. Well. We discovered that there is a harmonica in his foster home. We know that he loves his play piano, as well, so maybe there is hope for a musical Bowler after all! Matt definitely needs to brush up on his guitar and harmonica skills, and we will be keeping our piano (sorry, Matt).

We blew bubbles and colored briefly. He is a BUSY guy! It made my heart soar to see no physical or mental limitations. Occasionally (but rarely), parents arrive and discover a special need that requires attention. He will certainly have obstacles to overcome in his transition to his forever home, but we found no concerning "surprises." Thank you, Jesus! That said, no "surprise" could have lessened our love for him.

The social worker and Tai's foster mom stayed in the room for that first meeting. The social worker was able to translate questions that I wanted to ask his foster mom. She told us that Tai loves to listen to Matt's voice. She said that he looks at our pictures, wraps his arms around himself in a hug, and says, "Sarang hae." I love you. Melt. My. Heart. I received a list of Tai's food likes and dislikes. The only foods that were checked as "dislikes" were octopus, squid, and tomatoes. I can live with that. It also looks like I need to learn how to make seaweed soup.

Our time together flew by quickly. We were allowed to accompany him to the clinic in the building, where he was weighed and measured. Grant played "peek-a-boo" with him, which resulted in uncontrollable giggles. It was finally time to say goodbye, and we received some quick hugs. I even received a "po-po" (kiss).

We were completely drained, but high on emotions when we bid farewell. We looked to Greg and said, "I think that went pretty well." He nodded immediately. "Definitely. They can go either way, and I don't think they can get any better than that."

With that, we bid farewell to Greg until we return to take custody. We collapsed in a cab, and returned to our hotel... grinning from ear to ear.